Prelude: I am not going to be a personal coach. I am not even trying to be one. The content of this post may vary and your personal experience might differ. I don’t want to give you advice on how to live your life. This post is just a personal reminder on how I want my life to follow a certain path.
First things first. Let me ask you an easy question:
When was the last time you can think of, you were a happy person and really satisfied with your life?
If you have to think about it, to answer this question, you might want to reconsider your life and the way you live it. Your time is already running out. Your life is not going to start “soon” – you are in the middle of it. Your remaining days on earth are finite and if you don’t start living your life how you want it now, you might miss out. I mean, if you are interested in this post, you obviously are already at a point in which you are considering different facts to be stumbling stones.
I want to unveil five ways I am employing on the way I’m going down the road that is my life. Some or even all of them might not apply to you as well as they do for me, or wouldn’t even work out for you at all. Also while trying to use these for your own way of living, you will most definately find yourself failing to do that from time to time. Like with all the other tips you find on the internet, they will take effort to employ and you will most likely have to remind yourself to use them along the way. These following steps apply to every situation you may fail at some point in life. Be it relationship problems, issues with your job, friend related stuff or any other
While it’s the most easy way to point fingers, blame others or find excuses for why you failed, you should really stop doing that. Start taking responsibility and find the reasons for your failure by recapping on how you ended up at that certain point. Make notes and keep them as a sort of checklist to avoid making these mistakes again in the future. This will probably have a huge impact on your life. When I started to take responsibility for my mistakes I started to be happier because I noticed that I am arguing and fighting less in relationships and jobs. You should by no means search mistakes where there are none. Do not take responsibility for things that are obviously not your fault.
The only thing standing between you and your goal is the bullshit story you keep telling yourself as to why you can’t achieve it.
– Jordan Belfort
Like seriously. This is a big one. It doesn’t matter if a loved one or a partner from your job is the one that is constructing lies, you will end up feeling betrayed and will certainly feel a violation of trust. To be a better person, this step almost singlehandedly helped me achieving this. What you have to learn though is, that you express yourself clearly, don’t leave out important parts and be honest to yourself. If you are unsure, talk about what you want to achieve instead of the way you are planning to employ. DO NOT construct lies and stories around your actual life. These creations will ultimately collapse on you sooner or later.
If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.
– Mark Twain
While it is okay to follow a person of interest and have your personal idols, you should by no means try to reenact his or her life. Instead be yourself. Find your own strengths, refine your skills and start creating your own personality. Don’t walk in someone elses footsteps – walk your own path. Align yourself with the way your think about society and values. Commit to your beliefs and establish yourself in this society. All you need for this is focus. Project a lifegoal onto the horizon and start making your own way to finally reach it. On the way you will of course fall several times, but if you do not lose focus you will ultimately be there.
Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.
– Oscar Wilde
This one might be one of the reasons why you end up being frustrated often. Do not push yourself into one corner and close yourself out from any other influences. This starts at taste in music (let tunes hit your ear, even if you usually don’t listen to that genre. TRUST ME!), followed by trying out new activities and ultimately having your partner bring in fresh wind into your relationship. It is never too late to cut ropes and start off new. Allow changes in your life and never stay the same for too long. Change is good – take the opportunities you are given or else you might regret missing out sometime later.
I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they’re right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.
– Marylin Monroe
Do not let feelings control you
Don’t get me wrong. Emotions are good but they might blind your vision. The worst influencers here are anger and jealousy. Those two feelings are so strong, that in those times you start raging about them, you are more or less blindly running amok, hurting everyone around you. There’s no golden way to approach this issue – you really have to find one for yourself. What works for me, is being proud instead. Start allowing yourself to be proud about what you have, achieved or aquired along the way, instead of being angry or jealous. If someone starts flirting with your girlfriend, be proud about being the one she chose, instead of being angry and jealous at her. If a sidegoal on the way to your ultimate lifegoal fails, don’t be angry, instead start thinking about an alternative way to get back on track.
People want you to be happy.
Don’t keep serving them your pain!
If you could untie your wings
and free your soul of jealousy,
you and everyone around you
would fly up like doves.
– Jalaluddin Rumi
As I stated in the opener. This post might not be applicable to your life. Take it with a grain of salt and adapt it to your own way of living.
I would also be interested in what YOU think are the best tips to give on living. Please leave a comment or write your own blog and link this post, so I get a trackback notification. #blogparade 🙂